I don't know if he realizes that he's scaring people away. ... So he tries not to do anything that would drive someone off, including being so rude as to suspect them of being untrustworthy. ... And he can't figure out why that very openness would cause people to draw away.

I think this is the main bit where we'll have to agree to disagree. I think l!"Stephen" is very aware of how he's causing people to flee from him. I don't think he'd ever admit it to anyone, and he'd certainly feign confusion, but I think that when you get down to it, he's just as aware of what he's doing as is c!"Stephen".

I'm currently trying to imagine my little pet pairing, (Wilson/"Stephen", of course =P) and I sadly think it would not work at all with l!"Stephen". c!"Stephen" and Wilson have issues that dovetail nicely (Stephen's neediness; Wilson's need to be needed; the way they both present that 'I'm so perfectly put together! See!' front; Stephen's lack of subtlety to complement the way Wilson is the definition of subtle; so on and so forth) but I think he and l!"Stephen" would be tragically incompatible.

...which is why it's doubly-interesting that l!"Stephen" and c!"Stephen" both fit with Jon extremely well. Jon's just that awesome, apparently. =P